Settle in, grab a cup of coffee and enjoy your stay here at Shelly's. The pie is great, the coffee pot is always on and soon you will find this to be the best place in town. SOON TO BE AMERICA'S MOST READ BLOG

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

PELOSI CALLS ON THE WORLD TO PRACTICE PEACE SAN FRANCISCO STYLE


With just a few hours after the announcement of the Democrats taking both House and Senate in a surprising victory that stunned both the nation and the world, death and destruction continues.


Nancy Pelosi, speaker-wanna-be, announced in a press conference today, complete with gaiety, from her podium hidden somewhere below the Golden Gate, there will be no more death due to American influence anywhere on the globe or in outer space.

An aide to Ms Pelosi, Benji Dogma and Sprinkles Sunshine McBeemer, who are the same person with split personalities, have been commissioned to create peace where no peace has existed by using positive American influences.

"We live in a world where America has long created home schooled terrorist because we want to change cultures," Pelosi said. "If Moslems want Burkas, then we should start a Burka For Peace program, instead of sending troops and creating an atmosphere for insurgents to blow us up."

Pelosi went on to explain that San Francisco has much to offer the Eastern cultures like chocolate, coffee and male pornography.

"Hey, if they try what we can offer them then we can show them how to make money on theaters, show tunes, museums and bath houses, and forget about oil which has been something the Bushies just love to go to war over," Pelosi added.

San Francisco is the worlds largest exporter of All American Girlie Boy material second only to darn tough women, which the Bay Area desires not to elevate at this time.

"The days of bad karma, angry terrorists and world domination by America is finished as the beautiful people showed us yesterday at the voting booths. Kiss, kiss and you know you're gonna love me." Pelosi said, as she made her grand wide-eyed exit of the stage.

Meanwhile, Hamas leaders vowed to retaliate with force against a deadly Israeli strike which killed at least 18 Palestinian civilians in the Gaza Strip this morning, a suicide bomber killed at least 35 soldiers at an army base in northwest Pakistan on Wednesday in an attack officials said was likely revenge for a missile strike against an al-Qaeda training camp, and Sri Lankan forces bombarded rebels with artillery on Wednesday hit a school where scores of civilians had taken refuge from the fighting, killing at least 45 Tamils and wounding 125 others in the country's east.

It is also likely North Korea has missiles pointed towards the U.S. and Cleveland, governed by Democrats, as of today, is the poorest and one of the most dangerous city in America.

9 comments:

Robert said...

I'm sticking with Megadeth: "Peace Sells, But Who's Buying?"

I'm just a boring old man up past my bedtime. What do I know?

camojack said...

"Kiss, kiss and you know you're gonna love me." Pelosi said, as she made her grand wide-eyed exit of the stage.

The reason she's so wide-eyed is because she's had so many facelifts...she can't close 'em.

Hawkeye® said...

An aide to Ms Pelosi, Benji Dogma and Sprinkles Sunshine McBeemer, who are the same person with split personalities

MUWHAHAHAHA! Good one!

(:D) Regards...

Beerme said...

Now, now, Ms RightWing,

Don't go harshing her mellow this soon, she's not even the presumptive Speaker, yet!

By next year the new military camo pattern will be paisley, if there is a military...

Just call me Shelly said...

beerme

The first one oput of the gate is the winner. I can't wait for Washinton to have a great time.

Alas Thanksgiving is coming soon so I got to get back to my normal stories too.

Possum

Goodnight, sweet dreams and not to worry, I see this moment in time as foder for the writers.

The PJ bloggers are going to kill this new bunch of weirdos

Benji Dogma and Sprinkles Sunshine McBeemer say goodnight

camojack said...

"By next year the new military camo pattern will be paisley, if there is a military..."

Man, and I just got another ½ dozen of the "woodland" pattern delivered, too! Oh well.
:-(

Anonymous said...

I just love Paisley. San Francisco values, oh don't forget to wear a flower - throw out your flag lapel pins. Starry eyed and born afresh, I am already getting my first fitting from BurkaBabesRUs. Black on the outside, paisley on the inside. Allay-at-the-bar!

Just call me Shelly said...

camo

I thought the new fatigues would have a chicken on it,,, hmm well paisley says it soo good. I feel like breaking out in a Babs song.

People who love people are the luckiest people in the world,,,,,,,,,,,,,


mig

oh yes a song, hmm how about Eric Burton's San Francisco Nights--be sure to wear a flower in your hair.

camojack said...

Ms. RightWing, Ink:
Paisley camo I could wear...but not any with a chicken on them.

Oh, yeah; ELEVENTEEN!!!