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Thursday, February 16, 2006

Former Vice President Finding The Monk Money World Tour To Be Rather Challenging

With a large black T-shirt scrawled with the words Monk Money World Tour, Al Gore, one time understudy to President Bill Clinton, stepped off a jet in Ho Chi Minh City waving briskly to the little people who came out to welcome him and his wife, what's her name.

After a successful tour of Saudi Arabia now behind him, the often disconsolate, self proclaimed radical leader looked to be happy, but experts agreed, a war is ragging in his heart.

After six years of a brisk American economy, sucess in a war against terrorism and the highest graduating rate in decades, Gore said it was time to hit the road and tell the truth about the Bush administration.

"America is brutally torturing men, women and children from nearly country on earth and if I sit around my White House-look-alike-home in Tennessee and forever hold my peice, then me and my wife, what's her name, will soon lose our hard earned legacy," Gore said before a throng of Vietnamese who had no idea what he was saying.

Gore, has often taken on issues that don't mean diddly-squat to Americans.

After brain storming with his wife, what's her name, they decided he needed to quit sitting around the house, moping, gaining weight and forgetting to shave.

"We can't have two depressed people in the same house," what's her name said, "Besides the polar ice caps are melting and who better to stop that from happening but my little Al."

The Vietnamese chanted cute melodious songs to the Gore's as he stood before the microphone, but nobody was there to interpret them for him.

The local news media, Ho Chi News at Nine, forgot to send a reporter out to film their arrival so the Gore's were left to fend for themselves, especially after the private jet they chartered was commandeered by one of the little singing Vietnamese women.

Experts believe the jet was on the way to Pakistan, a country the Gore Monk Money tour decided to skip after he learned Special Forces troops were there awaiting his arrival.

Pakistanian authorities feared the plane may be used to transport Hafiz Mohammad Saeed out of Lahore, Pakistan.

Saeed, founder of the militant Lashkar-e-Taiba outfit and current head of the Jamaat-ul Dawa group stirred up about 100 people over the Danish cartoon and needed to fly to numerous other hot spots around the globe.

Tired and hungry the Gore's retreated to the Ho Chi Best Western before heading out to Da Nang and Hanoi to continue the tour.

"We won't be defeated by this setback," Gore said.

A local travel agent said the only ride out of Ho Chi Minh was freight train loaded with Pot Bellied Pigs.

"I feel somewhat depressed," said what's her name, Gore's wife.

The Monk Money World Tour will move on to Denmark as soon as the Gore's figure out how to get there.


camojack said...

What a hothead! I'll bet he's contributing to "global warming".

onlineanalyst said...

I think Gore's wife's name is Tippiecanoe and Gore Vidal Too.

Gore's mental breakdown has led to his wearing a bi-polar icecap.

When those cute little Vietnamese singers were entertaining the reps of the Monk Money World Tour, were the Ho-Chi Ko-Chi Girls dancing revue strutting their stuff?

With his concern for global warming, algore could show Saeed where the world's hot spots are in order to conserve some energy for both of these wild and crazy guys.

Ms. RightWing, Ink said...


I think you said it all!

Barb said...

Everywhere Gore and What's-her-name go these days ,they only see little people. Maybe they need to go on a diet,so they wouldn't be so much bigger than everyone else.
"I have boiling water from the polar icecap,right here in my hand ," Gore retorted hotly,when questioned.

Just Ranting said...

His wife's name is Tipsy isn't it? She would have to have been Tipsy to marry him.

Ms. RightWing, Ink said...

It is hard to play second fiddle to such a big money making man. That's why nobody could remember her Tipper name. I wonder if her mother named her that?

onlineanalyst said...

Ha, ha, Barb. I see that you worked in a Tom Swiftie with your post, too. That was Ms.RW Ink's last thread topic (du jour -- to continue the "cafe" atmosphere here).

Maggie said...

Al and "what's her name" also visited the infmous Hanoi Hilton and saw the handwriting on the wall"John McCain slept here".

Ms. RightWing, Ink said...

What ever happened to Dolittle was here