Perot Cashing In On Arab Money

Ross Perot, the spoiler of America's 1992 presidential elections, announced today he wants to cash in and grab onto some Arab money and sell his 8,000 acre Alliance Airport in Houston.

Much controversy has been raised in past few days as Better Homes and Gardens Realty struck a deal with Dubai Ports World (DPW) of the United Arab Emirates to lease with option to buy, a few economically depressed ports in New York, New Jersey, Baltimore, Philadelphia, New Orleans and Miami.

London-based Murder on the Oriental Steam Navigation Co., which had been running the six ports, was purchased last week by the Arab government-owned DPW, raising a few eyebrows in Washington.

Perot who once coined the phrase, "sucking sound," stood before a group of Arab businessmen with his pointer and pie charts, showing them how much money he has pulled in during the last decade warehousing cheap and mostly illegal Mexican products flown into his "secret airport."

In an interview only to be found on RightWing News Ink, a confused and flustered Perot said his ties with the Clinton's have grown distant as the last of the secret weapons have been shipped off to China leaving much of his wharehouse now empty.

"My friend, the only sucking sounds to be heard are on the East Coast. As you can see on my pie charts, Mexico is only good for importing terrorism and my airport could be very useful for a foreign country so it's time to cash out. Why there are billions to be made, it's good for America because I'm good for America," Perot said.

After reporters for RWNI interupted Perot he began throwing fits screaming "Can I finish Larry? Can I finish?"

Perot's fear is the sale of American ports will drive down the value of the Alliance Airport.

"Jimmy Carter never had a lick of sense when he gave away the Panama Canal in 1978, why he could have held out for a billion dollars from the Chinamen who now sell zillions of dollars of junk to Americans. A waste I tell you, now we will be buying trinkets from the Arabs. I've had it," Perot said as he threw the pie charts to the ground and started jumping on them.

It has been forecasted by several businessmen the lease/sale of the ports will create new blood for depressed sea port towns.

"Your all crazy, crazy, I tell you, I hope the sucking sound sucks your ships stupid," Perot continued. "Hello, ding-dong dagnabit, ain't you listening to me. This is your America, but the airport is mine, all mine and you all just don't get it. Now your lose lips sunk ships. I'm going home, good-by. Hey some wake up Admiral Stockdale, what do ya mean he's dead. He's not dead until I say he's dead. I'm out of here."